a love letter from Argentina

San Luis, Argentina

September 7, 2024

Hi Mer!

Can I call you that? I hope I can. I'm Valeria, but people call me Vale (for some reason, all my family and friends decided to use the same nickname). Anyway, I was just watching your last video on YouTube and found out about your blog. I love it! I don’t know why I didn’t see it before, but it is so beautiful. You are truly an inspiration to me.

Some introduction, I guess—I’m assuming we’re penpals now, so since I’m reading your not-so-secret diary, I’m sending you this “love letter” kind of thing. I'm a 20-year-old college student from Argentina, hi. In my country, some things are really different from the US, so I'll give you a little context. Argentina's economy is literally a big, dirty mess and has been since before I was even born, so in my world, we worry too much about money or, in my case, we try to ignore it. I love crafts, so I'm always into that kind of stuff. I wish I could send you a real letter! :(

Anyway, since this is a love letter, my first big love is my career. In Argentina, you start college, which is free but sometimes lacks resources (depending on your perspective), already knowing what your degree will be. In my case, I'm studying to become a literature and linguistics teacher, or an English teacher, as you would call it. I guess here it's more of a "Spanish" world. I love art. Letters, books—they are all art to me, and they move me like nothing else can. Since I was 15, I’ve wanted to be a teacher. Dead Poets Society has something to do with it, but as someone who feels deeply, I want to help people by showing them how much art can do for them. Today, I'm in my third year, so if all goes well, next year will be my last. I’m so damn excited to be in a classroom.

Also, my second love is trying to love the world I’m in. I really enjoy old things like vintage cameras, old books, old movies, old fashion, old music—you get me. I'm a vintage soul. However, I also feel like I’m a person of today, so I try to find ways to enjoy social media too. That helps me feel more confident about myself. This Saturday in September, I’m writing to you from my bookstagram account (it’s @entrevosyelcaos_), which I started as a poetry account. I couldn’t really keep up with the marketing stuff, so I decided to mix it with my college life and reading world. I’ve met great people there. Even though technology advances so fast, I think maybe everything isn’t all bad. I mean, I wouldn’t be writing to you or even watching your videos without it.

My third love will probably be people—just people. My family, my friends, people I don’t necessarily have to know to be kind to. People are so complicated but full of life, full of love. When I was a kid and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I replied, "Something exciting that lets me meet and chat with people." I still can’t believe I’m kind of on that path.

Side note: do you feel like home is a place or a person? As I mentioned earlier, I live in Argentina, but not in Buenos Aires. I live about nine hours away from there. Here we don’t have states or regions, but we have something called provincias. I live in San Luis, a small province. Well, it’s a big city, but people act like it’s a small town (we say: pueblo chico, infierno grande). I was born in Buenos Aires, but my family moved here when I was 5, and I’ve never really felt like this was my place. My family has a small but beautiful lake house, and I’ve been really enjoying it lately (I’ll send you a pic). Once I traveled to Italy—my mom’s family is Italian—and it was the best trip I’ve ever taken. I wish I could go back, live in a small town there, and work at the only school. Buenos Aires never felt like home either, even though I visit family there. It’s such a big, big, big city. Maybe my home is just books. Maybe my home is still waiting for me, or maybe it’s this lake house.

My fourth love could be a person, but sadly, it’s not. My first and only serious relationship was with my male best friend last year, and it’s not a good memory. Honestly, I’m not sure. I have some good memories, but I also have tons of bad ones. I think I just felt really disappointed that the person I thought I loved turned out to be this narcissistic guy who manipulated me and pushed my boundaries way too much. In the end, we all learn. I hope he treats his future girlfriends better—although I never want to see him again, and I’m not interested in unblocking him. The silver lining of this bad story is that I have funny moments with my friends where we laugh about his actions, and I’ve learned how important boundaries are and how essential it is to love yourself first.

Right now, I’m not seeing anyone, and I feel good about myself. Part of that is thanks to college, where I discovered that I’m quite an extrovert, and also because of relationships like this that end for the better.

I’m not scared to love again, and I don’t think I ever will be. I don’t know if love is real or if capitalism invented it, but I still love life, people, and art. So, since this is a love letter, I hope you love it too.

Sending you lots of love from here,

Valeria

P.S. I wasn’t sure whether to send this as a letter or a novel. Guess I went for the novel! :) I really admire you—hope you have an amazing day!  <3